Had a big day today.. Early in the morn had to go over to outram mrt station.. Was heavily persuaded to go for cikgu haryani's surprise b'day "party".. I was like.. "wat the heck.. Since i going out also just go lahh"... Well.. As usual.. the gurls come late.. Why is it the organisers who always come late..?? LoL..!! Funny fact of life.. After we met. Off we were to sengkang.. Slept on the NEL train wif music blasting in my ears..

At sengkang.. We had to take the LRT to haryani's hse.. We didnt want to make the same mistake during the last raya outing by taking the wrong lrt route.. And sure enuff.. We did that mistake.. And we all just "had" to follow delis.. Not once.. But twice.. LoL..!! it was funny..!! Finally we got onto the RIGHT lrt route.. And finally we got to cikgu's place.. At the lrt station.. i was frantically searching for a toilet.. I had been holding back for the past 1hr plus.. Couldn't find one.. On the way to the block.. Roslina's sandal strap snapped.. At it was kinda funny.. But i didn't dare laugh.. And she had to limp all the way to the block..!! LoL..!! And she said she just bought them..!! LoL..!! Guess functionality beats fashion.. U buy things for their quality and function.. Not how good looking it is.. LoL..!!

Surprised cikgu.. She was so surprised she closed the door on us..!! LoL..!! She eventually let us in.. SIng song.. Take picture.. Eat cake.. Open presents.. There were a wide range of presents.. Perfumes and such.. Wen it came to opening the last present by abg arfan.. It was rather traumatic on my part.. Abg arfan got her an iPod video..!!!! Aaaarrrrgggghhh..!!!!!!!! Every gurl went screaming..!! Most evidently roslina.. LoL..!! Here's the traumatic part.. Haryani didn't even know wat an iPod was..!! I was like "wat the fuck..??!!"... then somemore she say the only songs she listens to are tarian songs.. Then she handled the iPod so roughly as if it were nothing.. Everyone was like "woah.. woahh..!!" her every move wen she handled the iPod roughly.. Well.. dat's abt it.. The gurls went out with their conversations.. And we went to play arfan's Xbox.. Played forza again.. Wahh sain.. The game is too realistic.. Hard to control the car.. Played crazily though..

well.. me, dzak and syed bounced off b4 the others.. They were busy super gluing roslina's sandal.. LoL..!! Well.. we ( dzaki and i ) had been keeping sam and sinhua waiting for 2 hrs..!! LoL..!! Finally reached city hall.. was rather preoccupied wif certain sms-es Went to bras basah.. went to help dzaki find his architecture stuff.. Then walked to Suntec.. walked ard.. went to toy r us.. then went off to marina square.. I saw marina eating at long john's.. Met izzah and charlene at kfc.. ate at kfc.. waited for darryl.. He came.. we talk cock here and thr then went off to play dota.. Wahh... the place that we played at really fucked up sia.. Only the mouse very flashy.. Got disco lights emitting from it.. But other than dat.. it was bloody useles.. Had dzaki all mad..! LoL..!! then that noob darryl.. say his clinkz like one kambing likedat windwalk so slow.. So everytime he die.. we all went.. "Kambing become mutton soup".. LoL..!! after playing.. we walked ard.. then finally went home...

*sigh*.. Very tiring day.. Fighting sleep right now.. Had a very significant day on my part.. Some things happened *wink*.. Tmr must try to come early for soccer.. Gonna take pics.. again..

Well.. (why do i always start my entries wif "well"..??).. Oh well.. well.. Got another addition to my class.. that makes 3 new additions.. One transfer course case.. And 2 higher NITEC cases.. My class is kinda big now.. I think it's the biggest DBE class..

I still can't play any music on my laptop.. which is bloody hell irritating.. I need my music..!! Aarrggghhh..!!! had difficulty logging on to the school's wireless internet.. Bloody irritating.. Was cursing all the time.. Made lin kaung, yijia, dominic and ming yan freak out wen they saw me pointing middle fingers at the laptop screen and kicking the table violently.. LoL..!! Wen i finally managed to log on.. Instead of doing my pratical on circuit maker(r).. i was playing games wif andy who was sitting wayy across the other end of the class.. it was rather fun though.. he tot me how to play Hexic.. and he bully me also...

Had friday prayers after that.. I really enjoy the community that has been forged by my family's friends as well as their friends and so and so forth.. It really is, how should i put it, it really is.. Somewhat Great.. just great.. Not in the sarcastic sense.. But it is GREAT..!!! I love it.. It really is great.. We're like one big family.. always there for each other.. Helping each other in any way possible.. Everyone is part of a big picture.. And everyone is bound by the same thing.. Our great faith in our religion.. We laugh, we make jokes.. yet bear the significant order and respect that our religion holds.. I really love it.. it's great.. Wish there were more people like this ard me.. Every single perosn in this community is a rarity in the outside world, in public.. yet we have the discipline to congregate together at any given occasion.. Be it Family day.. Hari Raya Haji.. Or even attending events held by GRCs.. It's fun.. and it's great.. I love it..

WIshed there would be more of us.. And there WILL be more of us.. Insyaallah.. LoL..!!

Finally got my laptop configured.. It was a really frustrating period of time wen i didn't have a laptop to do, learn my programming stuff... And now that i have got it configured.. That's a burden of my shoulders.. NOw i have freedom of using the SP wireless infrastructure.. Well.. it came at a cost though.. Now every acer program has been wiped out.. And my sound device ain't working no more.. Which is starting to get on my nerves coz i always listen to music wen i'm on the com.. or in this case.. the laptop..


Nothing much today though.. Maths.. break.. then had programming.. During the break.. Me and my peeps went to FC4 which is the nearest foodcourt to our building.. Given that it's "so-called" the engineering FC.. i saw that NP gurl.. i don't know how to call it.. whether she was the one who saw me.. or i saw her.. Coz wen i entered the fc and was searching for available seats.. She fell into my line of sight.. and she was looking at me.. ANd again.. she gave that look.. She really is pretty to me... Her eyes are attractive.. They're always sparkling and she always smiles wif her eyes.. I dunno how to describe it.. It's just.. it's just that way.. Then her smile.. Wow.. A fine set of teeth to go with a beautiful smile.. Which somehow purses her cheeks and make them rosy.. She's Phat (pretty, hot and tempting).. kinda like fergie's, from black eyed peas, figure.. I mlike gurls wif that figure.. It's kinda nice..


Well.. Got 2 new additions to my class.. One a transfer course case.. And the other.. A higher NITEC graduate.. They're nice ppl.. After all.. with a class like mine.. every day is a happy day..


My life is changing every minute, every day, every week, every month.. I'm really changing, morphing into a different someone.. I don't seem to be spewing out vulgarities anymore.. LoL..!!

"U look exhausted..", "U look shagged...", "Why so sad..??"... These are some of the qns that i now have to answer almost every single day.. Is it really dat obvious..?? I try my best to put a smile on my face.. To cheer everyone around me up.. I try my best.. Yet ppl ask me these qns..

I'm exhausted or shagged or watever words u use to describe extreme lethargy.. Yes.. I am tired, Very.. As time passes by.. the days go by.. The more tired i become.. The responsibilities that i am forced to take are beyond me.. yet i painstakingly take them.. My energy is drained outta me at an immense rate.. I become exhausted.. Physically, mentally, emotionally..

Physically: I have a very high metabolic rate.. I use up a lot of energy.. I have to replenish wat's lost.. I need to eat, all the time.. The basic 3 meal a day is never enough for me.. I need more.. I'm hungry all the time.. But i do not have the necessary monetary earnings to satiate my hunger.. My hunger of replenishing my lost energy.. So everyday i trudge doggedly about doing my tasks.. Always ever hungry.. I'll eat any finger food that i come across.. Slices of bread with butter, cheese, nutella, tuna even fried anchovies.. I'll eat anything.. But by denying myself food.. My stomach shrinks but my appetite still lingers.. My mind shuts itself down..

Mentally and emotionally: I have nothing much in this life.. Nothing of materialistic value.. Thus the most valuable thing to me is my heart.. Being good and nice just comes naturally to me.. No matter how much i try to deny it.. I am forced to take up responsibilities not that of my own.. These tasks are way out of my league.. Yet i painstakingly carry them out.. I have to.. It's the way it has to be and has always been.. I have no freedom of choice.. I cannot choose the way of life i wanna lead... It's always locked away in a deadly cycle.. I don't even have the freedom of choosing the one that i love.. I simply have nothing to offer.. Everytime i come across an infant, a toddler, a young child who just learned how to walk.. I see a smile upon their faces.. the smile of innocence and genuine happiness.. And every time i see these small angels.. I let out a sigh and ask myself.. "Will i have a child of my own..?? I would really love to have a daughter.. And if i do have a child.. Who am i gonna have it with..??" Then reality slaps me hard in the face.. The reality of uncertainty.. My life has really hit rock-bottom that i can't even answer it.. My heart has been broken many times.. Thru betrayal and such.. That every single sorrowful event i go thru is like a normal thing.. I'm becoming ever so hollow.. An empty void.. My life's brutally sad.. It's a sick, vicious cycle.. I come to realise that i no longer know the feeling of love.. the feeling of love that kept me in high spirits back then.. I'm afraid to fall in love.. I truly am.. I'm afraid of looking deep into the eyes of gurls and to fall in love with them.. And realise that i can never love, and can never have one for my own..
I just do not know wat to write about my situation anymore -------

The only things that are keeping me going are that out there.. in some part of the world.. someone may be going thru a harder time then me.. And also.. that i realise that things are gonna change for the better.. Be it in this life or by death..

3rd day in SP... Had Structured programming in the morning.. My lecturer came late.. He said that he missed the stop at Dover and Had to take an east bound train at jurong east stn.. Jurong East Station..??!! I asked him what happened at clementi since it's after dover and before JE.. And he said that I was clever enough to notice that.. He finally admitted that he overslept on the train.. LoL..!!!

Wow..!! His teachings are sure damn great for a complicated subject such as programming.. Three bus computer architecture lah.. Compiler lahh.. Interpretor lahh.. Algorithms lah.. High-end language, C++ lahh.. All sorts of confusing stuff that he taught with extreme clarity.. He's great..

After that we had maths.. On the way there came across that NP gurl.. As usual in either her short denim skirt or her "hot" pants... She got a new hairstyle though.. NIce.. She was wif an idiot.. Why do good gurls always go for kanasai guys..?!?! Leaving the good guys with nothing worthy of them...?!!? It's a fact of life that we all have to live with..

Maths was fun... And noisy as well... The self proclaimed mickey mouse had a hilariously frustating time.. Quieting the classes.. Well that was done.. I learnt something today.. never eat food in FC 4 unless u wanna have an upset stomach and have a bowel eruption.. Dunno why the food there always makes me wanna shit.. maybe coz it's very heavy..

Went back to GESS though.. along with the majority of "senior" Gessians at SP... To collect our 'O' level certs.. Nothing has changed in the school though.. It gets more Ironfist by the minute. by the day.. by the month.. by the year.. Lucky to have graduated.. Met with michael selvaraj and khair.. Did the stupid handshake thingy wif michael.. Talk about this and talk about that.. Made him laugh.. then make him laugh again.. I think u guys should try it.. Whenever michael laughs hysterically.. And then he cools down and stops.. U just go up to him then say "hahaha" or make a fake laugh or repeat the element that made him laugh in the first place and he'll laugh hysterically again.. It's really funny..!! He can't control it.. I always do this to him.. LoL..!! It's even funnier if u manage to get him to laugh by saying "hahaha"..

Tmr go for the self certification.. Skip a one and a half hour class... Heck care lahh.. Only first week of school.. First lesson of that type for the week somemore..

2nd day in SP.. Nothing much though.. Coz I only had a 4 hour day from 1pm to 5pm. And i had it with my PT.. which means PEEE, DE and Project 1 all rolled into one.. The first part was basic physics revision.. Then the second part was ratehr confusing.. Coz it was breadboard-ing time.. A breadboard is basically a piece of plastic which has circuit ports all over it.. So we have to put in loads (bulbs, resistors) and join them to DC power supplies and such.. It's rather confusing especially the parallel part...

Gonna enjoy life here in SP.. Saw that NP gurl again.. Turned away in humility as she gave that i've-seen-this-guy-before look again and as always whenever she sees me.. *sigh*..

Well.. The first day of Poly life.. The previous week was purely orientation.. Got to know my personal tutor, Mr See Tow.. He’s a great guy.. Very lax.. He’s class rules all good sia.. The only thing to put in priority is respect for the other classmates.. Can sleep.. Can talk on the phone but make sure the conversation quiet one lahh… Can sms in front of him.. Can have quiet private conversations.. LoL..!!! This guy is great..!! He also said we're a great class.. LoL..!! Of coz lahh.. Got a joker like me in class of coz it's a great one..!!

He started teaching straight away.. He taught us Principles of electrical and electronic engineering.. He started with the basic physics components.. Which of coz bore me to death coz it's just plain revision.. But then wen he started wif the new poly stuff.. I was caught at a blur moment.. Till I got my groove on.. It's really fun..!!

Then he released us rather early.. So had an extra long break.. Shiok sia.. Then had programming module.. It was real fun and hilarious coz the lecturer was so hilariously self-centered, like Kumar like dat except he ain't a drag queen.. Then release us early.. So had an unscheduled break.. Shiok..

After that was engineering maths.. I hate maths.. At least that’s wat I first thought.. The teacher damn shiok..!! I must be in a lucky class coz all my lecturers are great people.. Just only left to know my character development lecturer.. Hope he's also great.. Anyway.. My maths teacher gave a rather hilarious intro.. She let us make fun of her surname, quek.. LoL..!! Its damn funny..!! She released us early too.. Damn shiok.. I'm really gonna enjoy poly life.. But one things for sure.. Cannot slack to much.. Must get either a B, A or AD in every single test.. That's my goal for my academic life in SP..

*Must revise on my Amaths again.. Must capitalise on LMC's great teachings.. Must score at maths.. Must score in everything..!!!

Aaarrrggghhh..!!! I want that NP gurl.. That'll be a dream, wish, fantasy, miracle to come true..!!!!!

Today totally sums up SP orientation week.. It was fun.. well.. at least for the first part of it.. It started with us being in a cmoputer lab.. researching and putting up a powerpoint presentation on the subject "Bionic Man".. It was fun coz all of us were doing work yet playing a fool at the same time.. There's a new addition to our class though.. His name's taufiq.. Well.. He's kinda of the black/death metal sort.. It was scary at first to meet him but eventually that ice broke and we became friends.. He's aite..

Then when it was time for presentation.. the majority of the class pangseh basically me, falina, hakim and the new guy taufiq.. And our presentation was rather fucked up too.. When the first class did the presentation, we knew we weren't cut out for it.. So we gave up.. LoL..!! We didn't do the presentation.. LoL..!!

Why does self certification of the notebook have to take so long..?!?!?!?!?! I gotta do it by next week and only on thursday coz my day ends at 1130am at the least.. *Sigh*

Flag Day today.. How was it..?? It was terrific..!! Instead of going ard asking for donations with my brothers, i went with hakim and falina.. It was real fun..!! We were stationed at yishun.. LoL..!! I've never felt so sleepy before.. Had to arrive at yishun mrt station by 7am..!!

Well.. At first we tried our luck by stationing ourselves by a bus-stop at northpoint shopping centre.. We weren't so lucky... But it sure was funny.. there was this ahpek who donated to falina.. And falina as a matter of fact is rather "vertically challenged"... When she wanted to give her sticker.. He didn't want it.. The next thing he plucked a sticker from her can and playfully pasted it right on the centre of her forehead..!!! LoL..!! Her was face was like are-u-supposed-to-do-that coz it's her first time selling flags.. She damn blur sia.. LoL...!!! Hakim was rather fortunate.. Lots of people donated to him and even gave him dollar notes..

We then changed location in between the mrt station and a traffic junction.. Our cans went clinking with the melody of coins, and notes, being dropped in.. We stood there for about 2 hours then took a break.. Ate at mac.. Falina seems to enjoy the current edition of happy meal toys.. I think so too.. Esp the pink one that tilts its head from side to side when u wind it up.. LoL..!! Hafiz likes happy meal toys..!! Well.. we parted ways wen we can't stand the afternoon heat.. I went to novena and went to jon's pent house whr most of my brothers were.. Then we went back to SP..

Well... I collected a total of $21.10... Since my collection exceed $20.. I get 3 hours cut off from my 10 hour CIP... I realised that, that cute and damn chio gurl that ahmad and i saw at NP is in SP..!!! Arrgghhh..!! Somemore in my school..!!! Arrgghhh..!!! She damn chio and cute..!!!

After that went to meet up with my brothers at the usual meeting point of the convention centre.. So every afternoon when all of us end at approximately the same time we all meet at the convention centre.. Went to eat at FC4.. talked cock, laughh.. And all the sort of crap that me and my brothers spew..

Sp orientation week Day 2

First up was the "Glimpse of Life in EEE" workshop.. Basically it ain't a workshop at all.. It's just an ice-breaker session with my class.. Upon the attendance marking.. I realised that my class has more people then i ever thought at first.. The new faces basically ponteng-ed yesterday's spice training so didn't see their faces..

I've made good friends with two particular people.. A gurl, Fadila, and a guy Hakim.. I think our friendship is gonna blossom like the predaconian clan in my former 4D.. They're really friendly people..

Well.. Played that famous ice-breaker game "wacko" and a ball throwing game dat really needs good cooperation.. Then got one part where we ahd to construct a satellite using straws, masking tape and raffia string... It was really fun coz we had very little time so everyting was just cut, tie and paste.. It was real funny... Then we were given a 3 hour break till our next programme.. Well.. Met up wif ahmad then went to FC3 and ate together wif hakim.. fadila went hanging out wif the other gurls..

The next thing i know.. Half of the class ponteng the next programme which was a 3 hour long DIP.. The first part of it was in a lecture hall whr i slept of coz.. LoL..!! I just can't stand it.. Yesterday i barely had sufficent rest.. One whole day out of the house.. Well.. the second part of DIP was really fun.. First, my tutor was very beyond-the-classromm type.. He told us what bioelectronics was all about and how it'll help me secure a job in the future.. And also how doctors are failures.. LoL..!! He said dat their job is to sustain the life of patients.. But one can never deny the fact that death never stops to rest and we'll all die one day.. So if the doctor's job is to sustain the life of the patients.. The patients eventually die.. yet people pay them a lot.. So we're all paying failures.. LoL..!!

We got to use several hi-tech medical equipment... We measured heart rate, percentage of oxygen in each inhalation and the blood pressure by attaching wires to electrodes pasted to the hands and the feet.. We got to use the ultrasound scanner too.. It was real fun.. Then we also got to use the various software to compile data.. Like testing the amount of force a person has in a grip.. My grip strength.. 30.89 kg.. For a small kid.. i have a rather strong grip as told by the tutor.. So gurls.. If u ever get to hold hands wif me.. ya'll be really comforted when i grip ur hands and make ya'll feel secure.. And ya'll definitely not want me to let go.. LoL..!!

Tmr got flag-day.. I dunno whr to go sia.. dowan to go to my allocated area of yishun.. Far sia..

SP orientation 06/07.. The gang was suppose to gather at dover mrt at 7am.. only sathesh, lirong and ahmad jumadi were there.. The other's ..?? Dunno.. Jasper only awoke when my school's orientation started at 8am.. rather packed the convention centre was.. Found my class then bounced off into the convention hall.. Rather big place.. we were to sit at different parts of the hall according to our respective courses..

I came to realise that DBE only occupies a timy portion of the hall.. Sathesh sat wif me though.. coz DASE was next to DBE.. All the talks were damn boring.. But the singer of the SP song was really, really too enthu.. LoL..!! There was one particular lecturer who really, really talked very VERY slow.. by the time he finished reading his presentation.. My head was bobbing away as i dozed off.. LoL..!!

Well.. after the convention thingy ended.. i had SPICE training with my class.. My class.. Not bad at all.. no chiobu lahh of course.. But there seems to be a rather large number of foreign international students.. I was also sleeping in the SPICE class.. i hid my head behind the computer screen.. LoL..!!

Met up with the gang later at the entrance of the convention centre.. Saw lots of people.. Esp old primary school friends.. Jon had alrdy went to west coast recreational centre wif nadiah.. The rest of us were waiting for jasper and kokhow.. But i didn't follow jovee and the others to west coast.. I can't.. today i got religious class.. So went to eat with dzaki, jasper, lirong, dzaki and sathesh.. then bounced off home..

Haiz.. Why my course the Diploma Induction Programme (DIP) takes so long..?!?! Somemore got DIP I & II.. The other courses take about 1 hour.. And mine takes 3 and half hours Each...!!!!!!! Tmr one full day at SP.. from 830am all the way to 5pm.. gonna be very tiring..

I want more chiobus..!! LoL..!!

Now this is wat i call pure professional out-of-the-blue, improvisional jokes...

Damnit..!!!
Finally received my appeal reply letter.. And from the first word i think y'all should nkow wat it is.. My appeal was unsuccesful.. DAMN..!! I still remember me and vanga would go around saying, "Fuck MI..!!".. Now it's "Fuck SP..!!!" Sialla.. Why appeal never get sia..??!!! My points sufficient wat.. Damnit.. I'm totally lost for words.. I dunno whether to curse and swear or just shake my head in disbelief and leave it to fate.. Haiz.. Really hurts mann..

Nevermind, nevermind.. Patience and Resilience will see me thru.. Just got to persevere with it.. And by god's will i'll succeed.. I'll Suceed..!!! I'll be in the same school as Sathesh and Khalaf.. Even though we're in different courses.. as long as it's the same school it'll give me a higher probability in meeting them.. Rather than my other friends in other parts of SP.. The campus is dat damn big..

SP, DBE.. Here I come..

These gurls are BEAUTIFUL...!!!! Absolutely, astonishingly, enchantingly beautiful...!!! Mann... They're Cute.. They're Beautiful.. They're Bubbly... They have flawless, luminous skin.. Big, sparkly eyes that makes the inner self bristle with energy.. Not to mention those beautiful smiles.. WOW...!!! They're SO BEAUTIFUL..!!!! ARRGGHHHH...!!!

Check this lil' guy out.. He's hilariously cute and amazing..



And for the real King Of Pop, Michael Jackson.....