It's about living in the moment..



It's like the moment when you are on the firing line, you look down at your fingers on the bowstring, ensuring the nock sits properly in between your fingers then you lift the bow up and begin the sequence of drawing the bow. And then the whole world suddenly shuts off and everything becomes silent. And as you look at the target down the range, your arms, your back, your body subconsciously carries out the movement of drawing the bow and then you come to anchor.



And as your eyes burn into the target metres away, you can hear your heart beat in slow, steady thumps. Then you hear a distinct "click" of metal on metal and an explosion of movements occur and you watch as the target gets impaled by your arrow.



It's like the moment when you've already ran 32km in the marathon and have only 10km to go. Your body screams at you to stop what you're doing but you just shut it all away. You don't want to hear anything. You just look down at the ground in front of you and will your feet to continue maintaining the running pace. You can feel the asphalt, the concrete, the gravel underneath your shoes. You run. And every footfall you make your calves tear apart and pain goes searing through your body. You don't want to hear the laments and complains of other runners regretting their entry into the marathon.



And as you near the finish. Your world suddenly becomes loud as spectators and race officials shout and cheer you on the last few metres. You look up and you see the time clock counting. And then the world becomes silent again. You look down at your thighs that have worked like pistons in a car engine throughout the whole race and will them to continue for just one last time. Your pace suddenly quickens, the cacophony of your body screaming and your laboured breathing dies down. And you feel yourself going faster and faster. And then you cross the shadow of the finishing banner and you look up. You've completed the race. You clench your fist in achievement and walk, contented with a smile across your face to the finishers tent.



It's like the moment where you've just cast your lure out and watch as it splashed into the water. And as the ripples of the lure's entry into the water dissipate, your world suddenly just quietens down and it's just you and your lure. You work the lure with the most steady of movements with your wrist that is holding the rod as the other hand slowly turns the handle of the reel. And with the quickest, deftest of movements, you flick your wrist in a rip and a jerk, to give the lure a injured baitfish action. To make it as lifelike as possible with the rips and jerks. And you continue to carry out the sequence of movements.



And then your world implodes as a fish explodes onto your lure. Inhaling it and getting a hook pierced through. Your rodhand instantaneously jerks upwards to get the strike and the hookset. And as you battle the fish on the other end of the line. Your world just gets shut away. The only thing you hear is the screaming of the drag on your reel as the fish fights to rid itself free. Your forearms strains as it battles to quickly reel in the line to get the fish in and slowly tire the fish out. And then, like how it all started. The fish tires away and you lift the fish out of the water and you just look at it in silent admiration and awe. You unhook the fish and release it back into the water. A wide grin across your face.



And.



It's like the moment when you put your barrel tip onto the starting frame. And as the referees call for the 10second warning before the start. You wind your body up like a coil ready to spring.

Your whole world just shuts off. And as you silently countdown. The sound of your heartbeat becomes thunderous. You can feel your breathing deflecting off the insides of the mask onto your chin. Your eyes just zero onto your initial spot. You can feel your blood coursing through your veins to your legs where they pool in the muscles that are going to propel you forward. And you watch from the corners of your eyes as the referees throw their hands down and shout game on.



Your world totally explodes and you spring yourself forward in a mighty dash, not looking anywhere else but your destination. As you dash through a mighty torrent of paintballs flying from opposite the field in hopeless vain to hit you. And as you near your destination, you feel yourself leaning forward and when u've lost control of your body falling forward, you give yourself a mighty push of your legs as you take off into a diving slide into your bunker. You get up and hold your marker up. And the game takes off.





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It's never easy to let go.. never is..

It was harder than i thought it would be -- to just let go..
something just lingers and just tells me to try again, try harder. But I can't. I've run out of ideas. I've run out of opportunities. And several things that I did in the past has just made things much worse and harder for me..

and i've come to the point where I have finally made up my decision. where i'm confident and content with this decision.



I like this girl. I really like her alot, a whole lot. But i don't want to chase her anymore. I'm tired of chasing. I'm tired of being proactive to an unresponsive person. I've through with chasing. I'll just let the feelings die away. Just like every other thing in this world -- just die away..

OK! OK!

Finally.. the main highlight of the end of the year..!!

Standard Chartered Marathon 2010..!!

Yes people. The annual inaugural event of the running year. The event I've been preparing for. Ok, i didn't prepare much for it. But nonetheless i did clocked in some mileage for it. One word to describe this day is -- EPIC.

And I'm quite elated. I can finally put away the ghost of Sundown 2009. Where i ended in a time of 8hrs++.. I completed Standard Chartered in 6 hours and 2 minutes and 45 seconds..!!! I could have completed it just under 6 hours if not for the epic moment at the end where i thought a chip timing mat was the finish line when the actual finish line was 150m away.. epic fail moment..

okay.. the night before, i went to Yam's belated party. I told most ppl that i wasn't gonna go coz i have standchart the next day. but everyone would be there and i already missed jovee's party. So might as well come down. And so i did. and kinda regret coz that left me with roughly only 1 and a half hours of sleep. Coz i came home rather late from it. Lucky i had all my stuff for the marathon all prepared on the dining table. So should i be late, i could just grab and go.

Was gonna run with kenneth loong for it. Met up with him. Got to the baggage deposit where it was mega epic fail coz there was so many ppl and it was so bloody slow. Met guolong here first. Guolong managed to deposit his bag first so he went off first. When we finally managed to deposit our bags, we were already half an hour behind the start time. So we had to run to the start. LOL. epic.

Okay so i ended the run in like 6hrs. so i can't possible write down 6hours worth of reading material here right? so i'll try my best to write down a condensed version of events.

Start was good. Got into a nice comfortable pace with kenneth that we both could sustain. But hey, kenneth's faster than me at 10km. but this is different, this is 42km. Our plan was to walk for a few seconds at the drink stations then continue running.. a walkbreak strategy.

the first leg was thru orchard road down to chinatown

at chinatown, it was still dark, so it was cooling.

after chinatown, we exited to nicoll highway where the sun started to rise.

Then it was to ECP where the bulk of the distance was. Caught up with Guolong here. Met sulaiman here too but he was already on the way back. He seems to have gone thru quite a change since the last time i met him.

and it was also where kenneth got a nasty cramp that took him outta the game and lost some momentum for us..

so the walkbreaks became more frequent as the pain became unbearable for kenneth. so i stopped with him. and during one of the stops, after the u-turn. someone caught up to me. it was my relative, Irsyad. lol. funny. so he joined us. his friends all had left him. so it was run and walk break all the way..

exited ecp to go into this weird place. the MCE service road.. this was the hardest stretch of the race.. it was the hottest..!! the sun was out full force and burning down on us and the worst thing is.. at 10km away.. it had no SHADE..!! not a slightest hint of a tree to provide a moment of gratifying shade..

super duper hot..!! i got a tan from it.. this was also where i met yvonne.

then the MCE service road exited to the newly constructed, Gardens at the Bay. It's the patch of land opposite the Marina Barrage. and it was also here that kenneth gave in and quit running the rest of the way.. he couldn't take the pain away. so he told me to carry on without him..

so i carried on with irsyad.. across marina barrage, thru marina bay road. exited to AYE where i met falina who was a volunteer first-aider.. and we ran up benjamin sheares bridge. but walked down it.. LOL..!! super cui lah..

my calves and forefoot was throbbing mad..!! now i know why ppl wore those compression calf socks.. think i'm gonna get a full length compression tights.. and have a look at shoes.. to combat this problem.. i had the same pain back during sundown..

we passed the F1 pit building, pass the Flyer where i met heechai.. at raffles avenue i met my wifey chinyan who just finished her half-marathon..

Irsyad and I concluded that for the last KM.. we were going to run it.. and so we did.. and along the way. across esplanade drive. there were some photographers and being me. I cheekily posed with a peace sign. LOL.!! and it was capture on camera..!! LOL..!!

So we turned in at fullerton and there in the distance, infront of connaught drive was a huge banner indicating which lanes should runner's from the respective distances take. And they had a chip timing mat there too so i thought that was the end.. so we chionged for it.. when we reached closer to it. we realised that that was NOT the finish line..!!! the finish line was 150m away..!!

that took the wind out of me.. so i ran as much as i could to the finish.. clocking in a time of 6hrs 2 minutes and 45seconds.. An Epic moment.

Ghosts chased. Self-respect gained.

i want more..!! next year..!! and i'll start training at the start of the coming year..!! i'll clock lots of mileage for it.. and i managed to get size S for the finisher tee so it fits me nicely now..!!

and i'll pamper myself with a new pair of shoes.. if i can't find a nice plush adidas pair, then i'll go back to asics..

Standard Chartered Marathon 2010 marks the end of running for this year. It's all rest time. Come next year. i'll start running again.. and do gymming too..

I WILL go for Standard Chartered Marathon 2011.. Come join me..!! Don't say i never jio..!!

But for now.. I'm in unbearable pain and waddling like a penguin..!!

3MC FTW