hah.

haven't been updating for quite some time.. been very very busy and too lazy to blog. ahah.

well.. MSTs are over.. how did i fare..? badly i should say.. never in my academic life have i encountered such concurrent mind blanks.. i'm fortunate that they only take up a small percentage of my total module marks.. i have to work hard on the other bigger percentages to push my scores up.. i really wanna do well.. and seeing how badly i did in my mst, not that i failed, but the marks are unsatisfactory and waaaayyy below my expectations..

archery too isn't progressing that much either.. i got used to the new form of coz.. the daily bow training has developed my new form into muscle memory.. it's just the mastery of the Hook technique and the string alignment, something which i have always 'felt' rather then checked visually for every shot.. but since this is a new form, things have to change.. i have to check it for every shot now.. and this new form sure is tiring.. the back muscles are used much much more.. and until i've mastered the Hook technique and consistently check my string alignment, my 'potential' (if there is any) is yet to be unlocked.. if there isn't then i don't mind being sucky at shooting.. i always have been.. =/

i'm starting to doubt myself in almost every single aspect of my life.. ALMOST.. my studies are deteriorating.. so is my archery.. my religion can't get any worse.. i've been chosen to go for an advanced course that will ultimately see me become a minor cleric.. and the course is on sunday.. i was like "wth..!! can't they do it on a weekday..? sundays are family days..!! ".. not that i go out with my family.. but sundays are archery training days.. they say i've been an apprentice for too long.. And they need someone with a good command of english, which i unfortunately fit the bill.. if my organisation had any public events (eg west coast grc with mr iswaran).. they would send ppl like me in to explain how our way of life is done.. and they're rather desperate for someone like me.. but i do not want to take up such an offer.. Not that it clashes with archery training.. but such things involve much politics.. the hierarchy of my organisation is too stuck up, selfish and arrogant.. they don't allow 'outsiders', ppl who's family don't possess a rank in the organisation to really express themselves.. they want the glory for themselves.. selfish.. arrogant.. pretty much explains why i've been an apprentice for so long..

*sigh*..