And so i haven't been updating in a while.Been very busy the past few weeks. ITP and the organisation of SP Open.

SP Open was a disaster. Everything went bad. Everything. But somehow, it ended up smoothly, yet somehow i feel very disappointed and upset about it. Of how simple things can be carried out smoothly if not for the arrogance, laziness and apparent lack of initiative from the archers of the club. The club lacks discipline, commitment and bond. Useless fucks.

I failed as an organiser, i failed as the team captain, i failed as an archer, i failed as a person. This event surely has demoralised me to the point comparable to that of the rockbottom i hit some months ago. It's just all very very demoralising. Everything just sucked. And my illness wasn't helping that much. SP Open 2008 was a disaster.I really would like to appreciate the help of the derong and chinyan for helping out in watever way they could and it really helped alot. Thanks alot. Thank you year 1s, thanks for sucking so much.

*sigh*

ITP.. well.. a slight turn from the slavery of soldering and assembling the controller boxes. As the days turned into weeks i realise now how the work that i do, this project, is pure slavery of a man's absent mindedness and greed to make a name for himself.

Luckily, my supervisor and colleagues there are very motivating and helpful. They're full of advice and jokes. They never fail to turn each torturous day into a relatively fine one.

Well. now. the production of the controller boxes has been stopped for god-knows-what. and i'm attached to the logistics department. It's really fun. I get to do lots of interesting stuff. But what i like the most is when the substitute driver calls on me to help him make deliveries. I become some sort of a navigator. Like like the navigator of a race car in a rally. It's real cool. And the driver is simply spectacular in his driving skills even though he's new at driving. Navigating is fun. I get to see lots of places and read road names i never heard of.

ah well..

i have to study even harder when school re-opens. have this urge to just do very well. have been slacking the past year. something must have slapped me right in the face and tell me "HAFIZ..!! Wake up lah u asshole.. u need to study hard dumbass..!! "..
yeah.. something like that.. yeah. like that.

memories of a happier past come haunting back.
the sensation of the memories can be felt as if it were the the very time it happened,
the feelings crawl against my skin,
pressing against my shoulders.
I feel 'em again, this memories.
They wrench my chest, where my heart used to be.
I sigh.
Insecure.
Sad.
Sorrowful.
Hopeless.